France V Australia

17 Jan

Being freshly back amongst le francais after some delightful ‘Aussie Man’ time at home, i thought i’d take a minute to reflect on some obvious differences between French men and Australian men…

An Aussie man will pay for a woman on a first date, to try to impress them. A Frenchman will only pay for a woman after he has already been suitably impressed.

Aussie men like a girl with a good appetite, as long as she is happy. French men like a girl with a good appetite, as long as she is thin.

If you even so much as make eye contact with a Frenchman on the metro, he will believe that you have fallen in love with him. An Australian would never assume such a thing. That would require analysing.

Australian men want to appear strong, and protect you. Frenchmen want to appear intelligent, and debate you.

A Frenchman will approach you directly if you do make obvious eye contact. An Australian will blush and tell his friends, but won’t have the guts to come near you.

French men believe that it is acceptable to spit and to pick their nose in public. Aussie men DO spit and pick their nose in public but are aware that it is totally unacceptable.

A Frenchman will tell you your arse looks big in those jeans and you could do with losing a few kilos around the middle (yeah i’m looking at you, No Name!) An Aussie man will do no such thing. But he will bitch and moan about it to his mates.

An Aussie man will go to painful lengths not to ogle women in the street, even when their breasts are practically hanging out of their top. A Frenchman will go to painful lengths to ogle you in the street, even when there is absolutely nothing to see.

Aussie men genuinely want to find that one woman to be with for the rest of their lives. French men genuinely want to get married so that it becomes socially acceptable to have an affair.


24 Responses to “France V Australia”

  1. M January 18, 2011 at 8:29 am #

    don’t forget that French men will wake up early and carefully dress to look like they’ve rolled out of bed, even to go to brunch on a weekend.

    • Poulette Paris January 18, 2011 at 4:08 pm #

      why yes that we have seen first hand, where as aussie men don’t need to make any effort to get exactly the same effect!

  2. Ross-Bif January 18, 2011 at 3:52 pm #

    Hello Poulette,

    I’m new to your blog but I’m very much enjoying the read. Really like this post! I’m not Australian but I have noticed the following…

    As an Englishman, I can say my nation’s blokes’ first instinct when going out to bars is to have a good time with friends (read: drinking too much getting smashed), the side effect being that at the end of the night they want to find a lady to try and worm their way into her…ahem, heart.

    French men it seem, have the opposite approach in that they go to bars exclusively to pick up women (and will ditch any friend at the first sniff of one), with the side effect being that by the end of the night, they have ended up drinking too much anyway.

    You often see said French and English men at the bar together at closing time, sharing ideas on how to attract the fairer sex.

    Such is life!

    • Poulette Paris January 18, 2011 at 4:20 pm #

      Ross, thanks for your comment!

      I really thought this one might have attracted a more spiteful debate. Maybe i am just too correct for my own good πŸ˜‰

      It’s completely true what you say! I think the French-English rhetoric is a close cousin of the French-Aussie one.

      I have been at the bar far too late, many a night, sipping some type of eau de vie while discussing the implications of both sides’ take on hooking a lady, and a man for that matter….

      If you can’t do it, you may as well talk about it don’t you think!?

  3. Poulette Paris January 20, 2011 at 2:18 pm #

    I must say i am surprised not to see Expat Stu weighing in here with some opinions, where are you Stu??!

  4. Expat Stu January 20, 2011 at 4:01 pm #

    Well, I don’t have a dog in this race. Any time you want to know what’s on an Englishman’s mind, ask away.

    …and since you haven’t asked, we’re as faithless and sex-obsessed as the French, and what’s worse we tend to like the Greek vase style of sex relations. Also we’re self-deprecating, ha-ha.

    • Poulette Paris January 20, 2011 at 10:44 pm #

      this blog is just getting more and more potty mouthed as time goes by. That’s the first time i’ve ever heard that the Poms like it Greek style. Interesting…. Ross???

      I think Aussie men don’t insist with that one, they already think that battle is lost!

      One thing the Frenchies are not is self deprecating, that is for sure.

      • Ross-Bif January 24, 2011 at 5:45 pm #

        Greek style eh? Bien, Γ  chacun son goΓ»t non?. I can only really speak for myself and the other small town folk I grew up with, but I was always under the impression that we Brits are happy with “it” regardless of style (and perhaps even substance!). The phrase ‘Beggars can’t be choosers’ comes to mind…

      • Poulette Paris January 25, 2011 at 10:42 pm #

        Yes Ross i was really surprised with the Greek comment too!! I thought Brits were just happy to have their meat and three veg, and didn’t really go for anything too exotic!!

      • Natacha October 2, 2012 at 1:52 am #

        I never understood why people say the French are not self-deprecating???

        They keep critizicing their country and making jokes about themselves. The only thing is that so many other people in the world do it too that they find it rude if, as a foreigner, you start saying bad things about their country.
        They probably agree with you but if they don’t hear the positive tone in you criticism/joke about them, they will defend themselves and try to prove that they don’t deserve this remark.

        As a Russian, I understand that very well! Try to say Russia is a corrupt country to a Russian. ahaha πŸ™‚
        We all know it’s true but we won’t accept that kind of comment from a foreigner, unless it’s very funny and we feel it’s said more as a fact than as a criticism.
        Try something similar with an American – same effect.


  5. Sacha January 24, 2011 at 6:59 am #

    As a half Aussie, half French male who has lived in both countries, I guess I have to chime in here and say I resemble your comments.

    Of course, the French in me wants to write an intellectually and sexually stimulating comment and the Aussie in me is much too shy, so I’ll stick to down to earth self deprecating sarcasm.

    • Poulette Paris January 25, 2011 at 10:25 pm #

      At least you’ve got the French complication down pat. Are you constantly berating yourself for your mechant thoughts?

      • Sacha January 26, 2011 at 11:31 pm #

        I used to. Now I try to limit the berating to when I take my daily aftershave bath. By the time I’ve dried off, trimmed my five o’clock shadow, had my aperitif of barrel-aged Chateau de Beer and dressed in my customary tank top, board shorts and thongs; I’ve cleared the thoughts from my mind.

      • Poulette Paris January 27, 2011 at 12:02 am #

        Glad to hear i don’t need to lose sleep over you then. I was worried.

      • Poulette Paris January 29, 2011 at 1:11 pm #

        I guess it all emerges again when it’s time to go out and you put on your corderoy blazer and oversized novelty tie. How can you look at yourself?

  6. nicole in paris January 24, 2011 at 8:53 am #

    I thought the second to the last in the list was hilarious! Funny post.

    • Poulette Paris January 25, 2011 at 10:40 pm #

      Ha i’m glad you liked that one! It was a last minute attempt.
      Hope to see you around here again soon

  7. Carol Holmstrom February 6, 2011 at 10:10 pm #

    I have to say both sides have their charms but the nose picking and spitting are huge turn offs!

    • Poulette Paris February 6, 2011 at 10:57 pm #

      Carol, i will NEVER be able to get over it. Walking past some guy, whether on the street or in the metro, having him huck and spit and having landing right next to my feet is the most vulgar thing i have ever seen. In a public arena of course.

  8. Aline H Rodrigues October 6, 2011 at 3:08 pm #

    Hi there! I just discovered your blog, and just loved it! Actually, I’d love to push the discussion further with some Aussies in Paris as I’m really attracted by their country/culture/people and would like to distinguish myth from reality. Anyone interested? Where to find them in Paris? Cheers *^_^*

  9. Jacinta February 29, 2012 at 3:24 pm #

    Great post!

    I am from Melbourne also and will be visiting Paris soon, now I feel pretty keen to explore some of the differences you highlighted myself when I get there!

    Thanks for the heads-ups πŸ˜‰

  10. Natacha October 2, 2012 at 1:46 am #

    I just found that blog by chance!

    I’m a Russian girl who grew up in different places. I spent my high school and uni year in Paris and did my Master’s in Australia so I can compare men πŸ™‚
    I’d say the first part of your article is definitely true but the end is a bit of an outdated clichΓ© don’t you think? πŸ™‚

    For example, saying French men are looking forward to having an affair and it is socially acceptable in France is a bit of an old stereotype! I heard so many people over 40 genuinely believing that… and strangely enough, they were all from an English-speaking country πŸ™‚ Young people don’t look forward to being married at all… and it’s not more acceptable here than in another western country to cheat on your wife/girlfriend. It’s just many people believe it’s not their business if some of their acquaintances are sleeping around while engaged in a relationship. They will not comment it in public but it doesn’t mean they think it’s perfectly fine.
    And from my experience in Australia, men there don’t look particularly more for their soulmate, ahah. At least not when they’re under 30…

    Besides, I so disagree with the fact Frenchmen are more straightforward and they’re more staring at girls’ than Aussies (or English). I felt quite the opposite to be honest! I never had a Frenchman coming drunk to me with a line such as “I’d like to f*ck you'” but I had that kind of interaction quite a few times with Aussies. They strangely said this kind of politely but the fact is they didn’t look as shy as you describe them to me. Maybe you feel that way because you’re Australian so Frenchman will go more easily to the foreigner you are than Australian men. When guys in France think I’m French (I speak perfect French), they are way more polite and shy than when they realize I’m Russian.

    The thing also is that French girls dress in a more casual/smart way than many foreign girls when they go out (English-speakers such as American, English or Australian girls but also Dutch or Russian who love to have a more bling-bling style – the style French girls would never wear unless it’s a Las Vegas theme party). This is why many Frenchmen misunderstand the foreign girls’ outfits as a way to say “I’d like to get a guy tonight, whoever that is”, which is why they will stare at foreign women so much more as they would do at French.

    I think also you are describing Parisian men, not Frenchmen πŸ™‚
    The thing you said about thin girls is so true but it is mostly a Paris thing, because girls there have more pressure on their shoulders to look good which leads men to believe it’s just normal to have a semi-model girlfriend.

  11. Angela February 17, 2013 at 4:26 pm #

    Hi. I just discoveres this blog. it’s great, especially the metro eye contact part. Ross is very English and Sacha is too “intello” to be an aussie. Let me add one comment, if anyone is still around/following this threads. An Aussie man does react when he sees a girl he likes. He will try to be funny, telling a joke loud enough for the girl to hear it, and makes sure that his friends/ accomplices laugh. It is a group effort, aussie spirit kind of thing. Dont believe that they are really innocently watching the sports on TV.

    • Joe January 16, 2014 at 11:57 am #

      Not happy with the implied lack of ‘intello’ comment about Australian males. It is a little sad for those of us who respect having an education and consider manners as essential.
      I find buffoons playing the classic stereotypical Aussie to be noticed and reinforcing a moronic reputation when they are abroad suffocates those who have broader interests than sport, cars and beer.(even though these interests can be appealing to some females)
      It is a shame if judgements are made based on Aussie males in bars. For example – What do people do in bars? i.e. – Hangout, and after a period of time drinking beyond their limit, tend to act and speak like a jerk.
      Forget trying to stereotype. Go out and look for a person that is respectful, loyal and shares interests and does not put you down. They are usually found in the most unlikely places, not bars and clubs.
      Sometimes they look asian or middle eastern but are third generation Australian with proud links to other cultures.
      Australia is a multicultural melting plot. So if looking for a friend, dig deeper and don’t put up with morons. They can be found in all corners of the world and in Australia we get our fare share of foreign travellers who behave poorly and try to do harm to their countries image.
      Cheers, from a the girls Dad perspective.

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