How NOT to seduce me….

18 Oct

Let me give you some insight into what we (being women in France) have to put up with on a regular night out.

It’s the story of a typical French douche bag.  I shall proceed.

So last night, i was out with a couple of friends, and i was casually chatting to a guy at the bar. Completely innocent, and the normal boring conversation about my ‘jolie’ accent and how i find living in France (note to Frenchmen everywhere…get some game).
Anyway, i take a sip of my drink, and the next thing this young guy is asking me if i want to go home and have sex. For real!!!

I had absolutely no interest in doing that whatsoever, so i told him that was a very bold proposition, but that it is not something i am interested in doing.

You would think if you were the guy, that you bow out gracefully right? Think again.

As with Frenchmen everywhere, their EGO is a very powerful emotion (see previous description here), so with a scathing, biting tongue, he told me that he doesn’t care anyway. In fact, my appearance only interests him for one thing, and after that, he’d have no use for me anyway.

Nice.

But unfortunately, it did not surprise me.

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10 Responses to “How NOT to seduce me….”

  1. M October 20, 2010 at 11:10 am #

    i think we should start writing a book of short stories on our collective experiences here. it’ll make millions i tell you. bust the myth of frenchmen and their wooing tactics.

  2. Polly-Vous Francais October 21, 2010 at 6:47 am #

    Do you think a Frenchman would have used the same tactic on a French woman? I think NOT. Time to discuss French male perceptions of Anglo women’s dating M.O.s and expectations!!

  3. Poulette October 21, 2010 at 11:13 am #

    Polly: Roger that captain, i’ll get right onto it.

    M: These two posts have a common theme me thinks. I can see authors posing for photos now 😉

  4. Poulette October 21, 2010 at 11:15 am #

    PS Polly, once again. Great idea. it’s as if Frenchmen believe that were are void of expectations to begin with!

  5. Expat Stu October 21, 2010 at 5:11 pm #

    Well, that last part was unforgivably rude, no question about that. But there’s no reason to be shocked by the direct approach to sex, as such. Since women always say they aren’t interested even if they are, what’s the diff? It has a low probability of success, to be sure, but so does every other tactic.

  6. Poulette October 21, 2010 at 10:49 pm #

    Hi Stu, thanks for commenting, its always lovely to have zee male commenters.

    Now, i am not at all suggesting i am SURPRISED by the attitude to sex, in that case, i do find it refreshing. And i did remark to the gent that i thought it bold at the time. It was just the egotistical reaction to my declining that, will not shocking me exactly, did very much disappoint me. (not mad, just disappointed, ha remember when your parents would spit that one out? Oh the guilt.)

    And in regards to your remark about women saying no even when they mean yes, i find this very intriguing. I myself say yes when i mean yes, yet i guess maybe other people don’t? I would be fascinated and forever in your debt if you might elaborate on that for me. Maybe too much time seducing French women on your part?

    Frenchmen, urgh, such extremes.
    It’s either hardcore interrogation, or you date someone 4 times in 2 weeks and still can’t even get them to kiss you. (Yes, that is actually happening right now)

  7. Expat Stu October 22, 2010 at 3:46 pm #

    Bisous Poulette… I’m married now and not in .fr, so out of the game — but when I was I had the experience many times of being turned down, but later things working out ok but under HER terms. One of them became a very long-term gf.

    I’m not complaining. Women are wonderful and I love all my exes.

  8. Expat Stu October 24, 2010 at 1:01 am #

    I just remembered a good story about the “direct approach” that you might like. Patt Morrison is a respected and very witty columnist for the Los Angeles Times. You can look her up on wikipedia — she’s 58, wears hats all the time and (although the wiki doesn’t admit this) she famously has a port-wine birthmark on her face. She’s attractive, but she’s no “ten.” I’d do her, no problem (I’m even older.)

    Anyway, apparently she was filling her car with gas somewhere in the suburbs, and some young guy came right up and asked her if she’d fancy going to the motel across the street and fucking. She was so outraged she gave him a right tongue-lashing and wrote her next column about it — along the lines of “What the hell was this young man thinking?”

    Ha-ha, I know what he was thinking all right. I sent her e-mail saying that I hoped the next time she felt like a quick fuck, her intended partner would treat her with more consideration than she gave the gas-station guy. She didn’t reply.

  9. Anna Van Sant October 27, 2010 at 8:58 am #

    “It’s either hardcore interrogation, or you date someone 4 times in 2 weeks and still can’t even get them to kiss you. (Yes, that is actually happening right now)”

    Lol this totally happened to me too. The guy was painfully socially awkward. Went on 5 dates, no kiss, invited him to a friend’s birthday party at a bar that served sangria (by Odeon) thinking maybe getting him drunk would loosen him up and still nothing. Then he finally did and it sucked.

    And then I did have the stereotypical married man graphically offer to visit me during his lunch hour. Yet with all the pitfalls I somehow see myself going better with French men than American men :-/

  10. Poulette October 29, 2010 at 6:13 pm #

    Stu, though i loath to admit it, you have a point.

    Anna, there’s just something about them that makes up for all the confusion huh!? Maybe it’s the thrill of the unknown. But thanks for the heads up on the future of this relationship!! Still no kiss, it’s moving backwards now, it may never be.

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